You wont listen will you, ive been patient and put up with it long enough but today was the last straw
3 hours....yes 3 hours i spent cleaning and detailing the car this afternoon, the first decent day i've had to actually give it some real time and attention
and you waited......waited until i had just buffed the last of the dodo juice off the bonnet before your merciless attack
feck knows what you had been eating...but on your flyby you hit the roof, the windshield..down the bonnet and across the front bumper with not a drop hitting the driveway..and orange? what the hell do you eat thats orange?
what was the point in this? your just evil and your lucky i dont own a rifle
but no more chances. i am now cancelling my annual donation to cornwall wildlife and birds, you leave me no choice. dont come crying to me when those trees are removed or your nests are raided..its not like i havent given you plenty of warning.
whats wrong with the neighbours renault kangoo? its not like the shit on that would even stand out!!!
the bird table will be sacrificed in a ritual or anti birdness and will now be fair game to those squirrels i have been defending your food against...the feeders will have their anti-squirrel devices removed and binned and i will make the effort to spend that silly price on wierd looking squirrel food thats to hard for you to eat just so you can sit and watch them chow down on your previous resting place
...oh i'm turning your birdbath into an ashtray
therefore if there are any badgers reading this and your charity needs annual donations then please get in touch i'll be happy to help.
Erk! I think you should be glad that you had buffed off the dodo by then as smearing Dodo and bird poo across paint is not something i'd really fancy doing :S At least it will have washed off pretty easily!