Sympathy sex?

1992 Views 39 Replies 15 Participants Last post by DSGlee, Jan 4, 2008

Mr Writer

Discussion Starter · Dec 19, 2007

Ive been thinking this over for a couple of days now and realised it was really a wrong thing to do.

Me and this girl are really quite close friends and have been since primary school.
On friday she broke up with her bf of 3 years and called me so i went out to the off licence and bought a bottle of vodka and a JD (no not with any intentions of getting her drunk) and proceeded to her house.

got in and poured her a drink cause she was in quite a state so i ran her a bath and sat downstairs watching tv whilst she was in the bath.

About an hour later she came back down and lay on the couch head in my lap staring up at me and i had never felt so sorry for anyone than at this time.

She asked me for another drink so i got up poured the second vodka and put on a film and went to the chinese, of which she ate little.

At about 11 i said i was gonna have to go home as i had work in the morning but she asked me if i'd stay.
I felt obliged to do so and so i did.

At this point she reached up and kissed meand from there it all unfolded and we went upstairs.

Next morning was quite strange as for a split second i wondered what i was doing bollock naked in my best friends bed.
I got up told her i had to go and get ready for work and that we would have to talk about this later.

I havent spoken to her since and its upsetting me so.

I have done something deeply wrong here!

Views guys please i feel as though ive taken advantage of my best friends emotional state and im horrified to say been unfaithful.

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Slapbladder

· #2 · Dec 19, 2007

Had this before.......its fine....she "kissed" you, remember

Plus its like making up sex after an argument.....top!
give it a few weeks and you will laugh about it.....or end up together lol.....
Plus you get bonus points if she is a looker

Mattchaps

· #3 · Dec 19, 2007

When you say you have been unfaithful, do you mean towards your friend or do you have a g/f?

All I can say is I can understand what happened, and if you have known this girl for so long it would mean that you have a very close friendship which can sometimes lead towards something else.

You just have to decide what to do now. I wouldn't worry about what happened, but think about how you move on.

Personally I wouldn't take it any further, speak to her but let things pass over and then try and regain your friendship... but this must never happen again and you should both know that :top:

Tokyo Dub

· #4 · Dec 19, 2007

You've got to speak to her and sort it out. It will only be harder to speak to her the longer you leave it....

Homer

· #5 · Dec 19, 2007

This is a wind up, yea. You are asking advice from a load of petrol heads, gonna be sound then!!

-R32-

· #6 · Dec 19, 2007

Homer said:
This is a wind up, yea. You are asking advice from a load of petrol heads, gonna be sound then!!

No he's asked a bunch of level headed people who all happen to own the best car ever lol

Best thing to do is just talk to her... explain how you are feeling, if it meant anything to you or her. Just see how it goes, if you are good mates then im sure you can both be sensible :dontknow:

vealige

· #7 · Dec 19, 2007

If she is fit I'd say Get In! Good man :knuddel:

Very Cherry

· #8 · Dec 19, 2007

you obviously have feelings for her and her for you, you just have to decide what it is YOU want and wether she would want that too. if thats the case then just go for it and see where it takes you, happiness can be hard to come by and i believe you should do what makes you happy....you'll be old before you know it looking back with regrets

if this is going to cost you your mate then work out if its worth the cost, ive had mates for years and then drifted apart from them, whereas ive been with my mrs thru it all (16 years)

1st thing you should do i talk to her, ask her for a drink somewher sociable and just sit and chat, ask her how she is etc and see what she has to say about it all before you potentially put your foot in it. once thats cleared up everything else will fall into place

youve known her for ages, she's still the same person, youve just gone to the next level, dont fear her

and theres nothing wrong with asking for advice on here for things like that, yes we can be daft at times but its always a good way of getting some anonymous perspective

and........you got laid :top:

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Wayne

· #9 · Dec 19, 2007

its that horrible feeling in your stomach isnt it?

I wouldnt worry about it, speak to her, if she had only had a couple of drinks while you were there i doubt she would be drunk unless she was drinking before hand so id say she knew what she was doing.

sp1boyo

· #10 · Dec 19, 2007

As wayne said mate , your both adults .

don't leave it too long as you may lose your best mate and or your next girlfriend !

just talk to her it will be ok ............ good job this isn't visordown forum .............

Wayne

· #11 · Dec 19, 2007

lol you read visordown? My dad used to run all the uk Supermoto races (british champs) and used to go on there

Very Cherry

· #12 · Dec 19, 2007

just re-read, she is your best mate and that youve cheated on your current girlfriend/wife?

cos thats not very cool at all and complicate things a bit more

.......still, you got laid tho

skeezie

· #13 · Dec 19, 2007

Sound's very complicated,but only if you let it.I would be more worried if your partner finds out, then what your best friend feels at the moment.
but then again if she does find out at least you know youve somewhere to go...And whilst your worring about what might happen, or has happened,I bet the pain in your leg has gone?that was giving you gip the other week..LOL:girlshit:

Mr Writer

Discussion Starter · #14 · Dec 19, 2007

Oh the legs fine it was the shoes that where altering the way i walked.

Well ive told my other half about this whole thing and after an hours talking she said simply that she doesnt own me and that obviously i can do as i please.
This made me feel quite awful.
And before i left she said she would phone once she had mulled i over for a while.

As for my friend, she apologised to me which also was quite upsetting but she told me it was an honest mistake and its best not to happen again and that i have been an amazing friend to her but thats where it should stay.

Im seriously confused and feeling a bit numb.

-R32-

· #15 · Dec 19, 2007

So would I dude, at least you was honest about it and hopefully you can all put it in the past and get on with things. How long have you been with your partner?

Very Cherry

· #16 · Dec 19, 2007

so basically you should have left it in your pants then as youve got no-one now

your girlfriends pretty understanding, mine would have chopped various items im quite attached too off

Wayne

· #17 · Dec 19, 2007

Very Cherry said:
so basically you should have left it in your pants then as youve got no-one now

your girlfriends pretty understanding, mine would have chopped various items im quite attached too off

same here. but then again im pretty sure we have all been here?

Just try and get on with your day to day life without getting too obsessive over anything.

Wait for your current to get back in touch, and also tell your best mate what has happened - its good to talk

skeezie

· #18 · Dec 19, 2007

TOLD ya Mrs????????????jesus christ man for the love of GOD NOOOOOOOOO!!
Should have said nowt.
Now to face the wrath of Mrs writer ..and youve lost all leverage in the relationship thats for sure.

Mattchaps

· #19 · Dec 19, 2007

All the best with the current g/f mate, hope she's able to forgive you and move on :top:

Massive respect for telling her tho mate, that must take balls, especially if you are long-time partners with a lot to lose. Hope you both work it out.

Forget about what happened and move on. I'd suggest not telling the Mrs that you are still going to be friends with the girl tho

skeezie

· #20 · Dec 19, 2007

On reflection you may have eased your guilt by telling your g/f,but they have memories like elephant's and one day it's bound to come back and haunt you mate.
What are you going to say to her if the shoes on the other foot in a year or so's time?
Just a warning friend,tread carefully:angel:

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